Blessed to have a special guest post for you today. Takiela and I are both Choose-Now Columnists ‘On Hope’ and what I love about Takiela is her passion to help young women who hurt and choose to self-harm because of this hurt. When we self-harm we are giving into the hurt and loving it MORE than we love ourselves. We are allowing the worthlessness and shame to mute our true feelings and emotions and the only way they can be released is through the cut, the purge, the starvation, or self-medication. It’s time we take back our lives and begin to LOVE OURSELVES MORE than the blade, the warped image and high. YOU ARE WORTH MORE.
Here is Takiela’s story of learning to love herself MORE:
Some people cut for relief, I cut because I wanted to die.
She’d taken several pain killers to prevent her from feeling any pain. Besides, she needed a backup plan in case the other thing didn’t work out.
She located the vein, turned her head and quickly slid the razor across her flesh. She winced at the sharp sting. The warm ooze drizzled down her hand and left its trail on the hard wood floor. She climbed into bed and hoped for death to quietly greet her while she slept.
That was a dark day in my teen life, one I’ll probably never forget. The pain and hurt I endured left me hopeless. Numb from any feelings of hope and craving death.
I know what it’s like to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Family issues, the kids at school, boy drama, grades, and the list goes on. Sometimes, life has a way of upgrading from bad to worse.
When in a hopeless state of mind, having hopeless thoughts and making hopeless decisions come with the territory (i.e. depression, cutting, suicide thoughts/attempts, etc.)
In actuality, although I didn’t realize it at the time, my hopeless disposition conveyed that even God is incapable of salvaging my mess of a life. It’s entirely too complicated for Him. From my view, things were the worst it could ever be and would always be this way – hopeless. Ultimately, I shut out the only One who could bring me out.
Thank God His view is far beyond mine, His thoughts and ways soar high above my own. I was absolutely oblivious to God’s plan for my life. I desired death, but the Lord…abundant life. There is no way anyone would have convinced me that God had a plan for my life that was full of hope. I would have completely rejected the idea.
Since I was a little girl I’ve I loved math. Why? Because to every problem there was an answer, each formula would provide an inevitable solution, simplifying the complex. I wanted answers to my life’s problems. Me plus life never equaled hope. Ever. However, Christ plus life always equals hope. Always. It took some time, but after many struggles here’s what I know, the Lord is my answer and He is neither simple nor complicated.
Can you relate to any of my struggles? Do you know anyone who self-harms? I’d like to invite you to join me in taking The Scarless Pledge right now!
Today let’s make a pledge, from this day forward we’re going “scarless!” We can’t do anything about the old scars but we can choose not to make new scars. Let’s put down our razors and pick up scarlet red eyeliner. When or if we ever get the urge to cut, use the red eyeliner. It’ll help remind you of the blood Jesus shed on the cross for you and it’ll also wash away…never leaving a scar.
I, (insert name here), being of sound mind and body, here do pledge to God and all who love me on this month (insert month here), of this day (insert day here), in this year (insert year here) to bury all self-harming ways, never to be exhumed again! In the sight of God and all witnesses, I promise if and/or when I get the urge to self-harm, I’ll replace my instrument of destruction with an instrument that represents hope, a scarlet red eyeliner pencil, instead. I will do this in remembrance of the blood Jesus shed on the cross for me, (insert name here). I am committed to the “scarless” pledge. With God nothing is impossible.
Find an accountability partner, someone who will help you commit to this pledge. Know that you have fans cheering you on and praying for you in heaven and all over the earth. Even though I’ll already be praying, if you’d like me to pray for a specific person/situation or if I can help in another way comment below publicly or email me privately (email@example.com).Take the “scarless” pledge today!
Takiela Bynum is a speaker and author with a passion for hurting women (teens/adults). She empowers and encourages young women to have hope in Christ, equipping them with the tools (word of God) necessary to live victoriously in spite of life’s tragedies. She tackles hard topics while pointing young women to the redemptive power of the cross.
In addition, she mentors young women (teens/adults), is a Ministry Leader at Campus Crusaders for Christ (also known as Cru, formerly known as Student Venture), a writer for the Sisterhood Magazine, Choose NOW Ministries (with Nicole O’Dell) and more. A sought-after speaker for women’s events and youth, Takiela has been key note speaker and session/workshop speaker at numerous conferences, retreats, and events.
You do not have to be an author to tell YOUR STORY. I want to hear from YOU. When you are able to have a voice not only do others listen but they realize they are not alone. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org if you are interested in telling your story on Just Show Up, it can be anonymous or if you have a ministry or story of HOPE to offer we’d love to highlight how God has ‘shown up’ in your life!