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No parent should ever have to bury their child. No matter what age.

My friend’s son passed away on Tuesday, November 18th. We prayed for a miracle and the miracle(s) came – just not in the way we’d hoped.

This is not my story to tell. It is Amy’s and one day I know she will share.

I’ve been silent because what I feel inside and what I’ve experienced and witnessed in these past two weeks is deep, complicated and would certainly be lost in translation at this time.

It begins with confusion – why?

The Way of the CrossAs they led him away they took hold of a certain Simon, a Cyrenian, who was coming in from the country; and after laying the cross on him, they made him carry it behind Jesus.

The actual way of the cross in Jerusalem

A large crowd of people followed Jesus, including many women who mourned and lamented him. Jesus turned to them and said, “Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep instead for yourselves and for your children, for indeed, the days are coming when people will say, ‘Blessed are the barren, the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed.’ At that time people will say to the mountains, ‘Fall upon us!’ and to the hills, ‘Cover us!’ for if these things are done when the wood is green what will happen when it is dry?”

Upper left corner is the spot where Jesus stopped and Veronica wiped his face.

Now two others, both criminals, were led away with him to be executed. Luke 23:26-32

Will we ever understand why Christ had to go through such torture and pain? Will we ever fathom the horror his mother felt as she watched him carry the cross on his shredded and raw shoulder? Why does their have to be pain? Why does their have to be death?

The Crucifixion.And when they came to a place called Golgotha (which means Place of the Skull), they gave Jesus wine to drink mixed with gall. But when he had tasted it, he refused to drink. After they had crucified him, they divided his garments by casting lots; then they sat down and kept watch over him there. And they placed over his head the written charge against him: This is Jesus, the King of the Jews. Two revolutionaries were crucified with him, one on his right and the other on his left. Those passing by reviled him, shaking their heads and saying, “You who would destroy the temple and rebuild it in three days, save yourself, if you are the Son of God, [and] come down from the cross!”

This is on Golgatha...the base of where the cross stood is in the little area you see us crouched in...we stuck our hand in the casing and were able to touch the ground where the cross once stood. Next to this (I failed to get a picture on my phone) is the rock that split in two after Jesus death. Also the top left picture is the stone which they lay Jesus' body after his death.

Likewise the chief priests with the scribes and elders mocked him and said, “He saved others; he cannot save himself. So he is the king of Israel! Let him come down from the cross now, and we will believe in him. He trusted in God; let him deliver him now if he wants him. For he said, ‘I am the Son of God.’” The revolutionaries who were crucified with him also kept abusing him in the same way.

Matthew 27:33-44

There is no answer for the timing of our death. Yet we are called to live this life in accordance to the Lord’s will to LIVE a life eternal.

The grief for a loved one is not FOR the loved one, it is for US. The loved one who passes is in the Father’s care, living, loving, beyond time and limitations. Living the PROMISE of his death and resurrection.

Christ did not suffer on the cross in vain and it is in times that we lose a loved one we hold to his promise of eternal salvation.

Please pray for the Banmiller family in their time of grief and for the repose of the soul of David Banmiller.