If you want to be heard you need to perfect the art of listening.
From experience most survivors I’ve worked with are the best listeners because they are used to not being heard so they treat others the way they wish they would be treated.
This is with the exception of those who are stuck in the ‘victimized’ rut of ‘nothing good happens to me’…’no one listens to me’…’it’s every one else’s fault’.
I’ve been saying a lot about ‘the need to be heard’ but I’ve learned along the journey that listening is the key that unlocks a lot of understanding about people and situations in life.
Today was a day I needed to listen. After a morning of accomplishing some personal goals I ‘heard’ how bored Seth was and took the time to watch a B rated Science fiction movie. When I picked up Ryan and his other four teenage friends from school I ‘listened’ to what was important to them, what made them laugh, giggle like little boys and ‘heard’ the underlying stress of being the new fish in a large pond.
Crazy high school boys!
Then my husband came home from a training with his new company and I sat attentively as he downloaded frustrations of growing pains, facts of upcoming travel that shakes his routine and listened to him spout off about the few extra pounds of summer weight he has gained and how ‘old’ he feels.
Silent, but present, I listened because sometimes we need to simply be heard. Answers aren’t always needed nor is a fix plausible or expected. Sometimes people just need the ability to talk, be heard, and release what is pent up inside so that it doesn’t fester into something more than what is simple fact.
The atmosphere in this household is light. Problems aren’t solved but no one feels alone in their struggles.
If you get the feeling no one ever listens to you, maybe take the time to step back from your own situation and listen to what others are needing to say.